The Twisted Muse: A Brooch Tutorial

The Twisted Muse: A Brooch Tutorial: Who doesn't just love a fantastic brooch to pin onto a coat, blouse, or even a stylish hat?  I know I do and my daughters definitely do t...

WTF

Life is too stressful, new house, leaving job, unpacking, everyday life... It just all gets too much sometimes. Unfortunately I am a make do type of person and when things are tough I always decide to pile the pressure on. I can't remember the last time I was on my own. When I say 'alone' I mean quality time, not having a bath or getting the bus... I mean spending a day in my own company. I know a lot of people who feel like this and also a lot of people who find it hard to be alone... not me, I love it... oh the things I could do with a day to myself, pluck my eyebrows, read, colour block my wardrobe, go somewhere and be anonymous. My next rant is this... I spend all day nearly everyday hearing my name and I'm sick of it. I want a day where I don't hear it! x

Monday already....

I have acquired a new hobby! Working on my bike. The week before last I picked up a lovely vintage raleigh sapphire from Ashgate Hospice Charity Shop... For just £15, super bargain times.
BF has taken the piss a bit because I said that I was going to spend some time working on my bike this week and weekend and he wanted to know what work I was going to be doing and whether it would require any power tools or heavy equipment, suffice to say his cheekiness was met with short shrift! What I am actually going to do is raise the seat, attach my basket, when it arrives from etsy this week, put my plastic daisies round the basket, clean the bike, polish it, use that special bike de-ruster stuff and maybe look at getting some new handlebars.... If this is not working on my bike then I don't know what is! Had a good ride on it yesterday though and riding round to best friends tonight to cook her dinner because she is laid up with a bad ankle... x

So....

Tomorrow is nearly upon us, a stressful day for lots of us unfortunately. Had a bit of a breakthrough with Zoe last night, she has all this anger and love bottled up inside and she finds it hard to express it or let go if it, it's so tightly internalized that it takes so much work to actually get to the root of it. We talked properly about how she is feeling about tomorrow, the problem is that so much emphasis has been placed on the actual day but she is feeling this grief all the time, it weighs so heavy on her that it has clouded her confidence  and self worth. I tried to tell her how proud her Great Nan would be of her and that she would love the young woman she is becomming but I worry that she just doesn't believe me. Luckily she has lots and lots and lots of family and friends that love her and in turn she loves back. She has had a really hard time for the last goodness knows how many years, it's taken her a long time to find out who she really is and she is starting to really get there now, which is testament to her strong character because I'm nearly 34 and I have no idea who I am, what I want or even whether I am worth enough to get up in the morning!

She is warm, kind, loving, funny and a delight to live with, I just wish she would realise all this.

My day is stressful tomorrow because I have my trial at Debenhams and I am going to be working solidly on a comprehensive merchandising plan... I am nervous with all the ussual self doubts someone has when they are trying their hand at something they are passionate about. The old demons get into your head and make you question your talent, self worth and all the ussual suspects arise. I am on my own tonight too as BF is currently travelling down south to his gigs and Zoe is having some time with her lovely boyfriend. I will get my head into my portfoli and make sure all the t's are crossed and i's dotted, then an early night x

The Husband....

Goodness I do worry about him. Regardless of the fact that we aren't together anymore we have managed to stay friends and support each other when there have been ups and downs. It hasn't always been easy but we made a vow to each other and although the marriage didn't work out we managed to get a pretty good friendship out of it. He is a good man, you may not have always heard me say this because we did have some terrible, terrible times and being in an abusive relationship has scarred me but I have been looking into having some counselling to help me come to terms with that abuse. We bought out the worst in each other... it's that simple, alcohol was the main problem, alcohol and a clask of two strong ego's. Since splitting up neither of us has had a wonderful time of it and James is coming out of a horrible relationship right now and I am trying to support him as much as possible but I have to bite my tongue because he isn't at the stage where I can say 'Actually James, Louise is a nasty, lazy, dole scrounging, drugged up, abusive, cruel and manipulative slag'.... Awkward... So for now I will console and advise but if I ever see the skanky little whore bag I will slap her so hard she will wish she was still whoring herself out for coke!

Whoop Whoop

Confirmed with Vintage Life Magazine this morning that New House will be photographed for a feature on Vintage Homeware Collecting! The hoarding is finally paying off!

http://www.vintagelifemagazine.com/

Here is the link for the magazine if people aren't already familiar with it, it's pricey to buy but free to look at online...

My avid readers will know that I am somewhat of a coloured glass collector. I collect mainly reds and greens (pale through to dark). I also collect 1960's shot glasses and patterned glasses from that era, 1950's champagne glasses and well all the glasses I can find. My latest obsessions is shallow wine glasses with coloured stems, so pretty!

It all started with some dark red port glasses, last used as a table decoration with tea lights last Christmas. In the interview my obsession with glass is naturally going to be the main topic of discussion, plus I am to pull out 5 of my most treasured pieces. As my usual decade of choice is the 60's I am going to do it all Mad Men style and make some martini's for my guests x

Nervous

I'm so nervous about Friday, I have put in all the work but I am a quaking mess! Looking forward to having some time in Meadowhall with Best Friend after training times though. We are off to get my Matron of Honour Dress... It is a less than conventional choice but would you expect anything less, ideally I would have found something vintage but there hasn't been time to source the right thing and I am losing more weight by the day so don't want to have to bother with altering something that would be tricky to alter back so I am going off the peg courtesy of Coast... Opting for the long, black, tight dress of course! Got some lovely shoes for the wedding from Office yesterday, really beautiful detailing on the heel.
Today I've summered it up with a long, vintage Laura Ashley dress in a pale blue with white flower, along with my AA black belt (found at the weekend by BF) and black ballet pumps! Hopefully a swelter free outifit, it's bloomin' warm in this shop. Excited about birthday times as we are having a little trip away the weekend before my birthday and then I'm booked in fo tattoo times on actual birthday day... Then it's young Ms Richardson's birthday (most important day of the year) then the BF's birthday and then Best Friend's wedding... super busy times, plus new job.... AAAAAAAhhhhhhhhhh too busy x

What in the earth possessed me to move house and change job at the same time... Crazy as a cuckoo! Then we realise we don't have a proper freezer.... This doesn't bother me but I have a 16 and 17 year old to feed and I never realised how handy it was to throw a load of easy to cook things into a freezer so they can help themselves when I'm not there or cooking something with the, apparently demonic, pesto in it! How is it possible to hate pesto, pesto is ace! I may try slipping pesto into every meal I make until they all get accustomed to it's wonderful ways!

I suffered another seizure yesterday, luckily BF was there but it was so surreal. I was unconscious for about 2 mins, and fell to the ground (nice and public, Sheffield Road). We couldn't explain what had triggered this one but I didn't fit this time so not as bad as before. It's frightening when you feel like you can't control what is happening to you, it certainly makes me regret not treating my body better over the years. I am booked in for an MRA and ECG in August, it will be a relief to know what is actually going on x

Informative and quick to read

http://www.vam.ac.uk/content/articles/a/study-guide-art-deco/

Enter this everyone...

http://www.vam.ac.uk/users/competition/win-weekend-british-glamour/

Trip to the Nations Great Capital Soon...

http://www.vam.ac.uk/content/exhibitions/ballgowns/

Looks like an amazing exhibition, if only it was socially acceptable to wear a ballgown everyday x

Madness

Listen...

I don't want to fight with you, this is boring. A mistake was made, I'm sorry, but there is no point to all this anymore. Yes you hate me, I don't care. Be happy in your life and enjoy it and I will do the same with mine, surely that makes the most sense. Why don't we act like adults instead of making nasty digs at each other. We both got hurt by a situation that was primarily my fault but please lets just move on from it, I know it's hard and I'm not saying lets be best friends and platt each others hair but the resentment and bitterness on both our sides is futile. I am sorry to you for what happened, I will always be sorry to you for it. I have given Zoe a home and I take good care of her, surely that makes me less of The Devil in your eyes. It's not easy to forget or forgive, I don't expect you to do either but I am apologising. I am still part of Sandra and Paula's lives and it is harder for them when we behave like this towards each other, it puts a strain on everything. Paula is my best friend so I'm not going anywhere, lets at least be civil to each other, please x

Long day

I have done so much work today, tis madness, why is it that the minute I have handed in my notice I suddenly have a new found vigour for the damn place? I can only declare myself to be a strange creature and have done with it. I keep having all these merchandising ideas and my head is all of a flutter with inspiration. I can honestly say that my creative side is fully restored and I am ready to set myself to any challenge I can get hold of. Me and Best Friend are going to get down to some serious planning and making. We are under no illusion, we know we will not be making our millions but money isn't important to me, happiness is and this is what makes me happy. Last year I left a job I loved, I don't regret leaving because I don't believe in regrets, I did the right thing at the time. I miss the people and the place and it trained me in something I have been passionate about for years. Now I am ready to embark on something similar x

Update on House Move 2012!

Well BF and Jay are doing a splendid job so far today, really don't know how I would have done it if we had left it till next weekend when BF has his two big gigs in London. Would have been lovely to go and see him and the band but I have my training on Friday afternoon and then spending some time with both the lovely Ms Richardson's. It's a very difficult time for them and also some other people who are very dear to me. I just want them to know that I will be thinking of them and hope that they find some peace in the fact that those they have lost would be very proud of them and that the love they had is still there x

Fleetwood Mac

When I was 7 years old I managed to covince my friends and myself that I had, in fact, written most of the Fleetwood Mac songs. At this time my musical education had gone from Peter Green's Fleetwood Mac through to the reign of Stevie Nicks (In my eyes the woman is now a Goddess). Myself and my sisters were blessed in the fact that both of our parents had a love of music and this was bordering on the edge of obsession by our father. Each of us has a band or even song that directly attaches us to our father for that I cannot fault him. They taught us to appreciate it what we heard and to listen to things carefully in order to gain the most from it. I am so excited to hear that Fleetwood Mac are reforming and touring next year. My last terrible, heart wrenching break up lead me to submerge myself into the album Rumours and actually a great deal of the Mac back catalogue! Sometimes I think that music is my worst enemy because it evokes memories and emotions I would rather hide from, but I suppose I am lucky that I feel something, not everyone has that.

Moving house...

Well it is nearly all done.... BF has done a marvellous job, super proud of his hard work. We have got the vintage funiture for my office and the workspace is all sorted for starting our creations. Best Friend and I are going into business together hosting vintage tea parties and renting out all our lovely homeware so we are putting together all our marketig strategies too, watch this space for your invite to the launch!
My adopted daughter Zoe is turning 18 in September, a week after I turn 21 (I wish) lots of thought has gone into birthday festivities and presents, should be a lovely occasion thoroughly celebrated in style!
Interview went amazingly yesterday, have my trial next Friday afternoon, soooooo nervous, have been working tirelessly on my portfolio and it is really coming together now but there is still far too much to put in, didn't realise how much bloomin' work I had done. The job is head visual merchandiser at the new Debenhams in Chesterfield. It is the best job opportunity I have ever had and it would be such an exciting career leap. I have done a lot of visual merchandising work before but to have the creative control of such a prestigious department store would be recognition of all the hard work I had put into my career. I know I have chosen to have love, adventures and a career rather than a family but I don't regret a single moment! x

Awkward Moment

I have just felt that surge of butterflies you only get when something truly life changing is about to happen. I have had a few jobs that have really inspired me and driven me to work hard and help forge a career for myself. My current position hasn't allowed me this luxury unfortunately..... BUT... Today I had an interview for one of my "Top Ten Dream Jobs" and I was selected for a second interview within 5 minutes of leaving the interview room. I wasn't as nervous as I would usually be, I just took it in my stride and spoke about the things in life that inspire me, designers, artists, music, books, films... how many interviews does a person get like that? Well the next part of the selection process is 10am Thursday morning so fingers crossed x

Some crazy fool!

This morning I was informed via email that someone had tried to hack my blogger account, weird x

The weirdest thing...

I haven't had any alcohol since the 29th May... People find this very strange indeed but now it feels normal not to drink. People automatically assume that the reason I'm not drinking is because I'm pregnant. I have really stopped because I wanted to and wanted to prove to myself that I didn't need to drink. I am going to start having the odd social drink in the next few months but at the moment I just don't need it in my life.

Absent

Sorry for being so unbloggy! We get the keys for our new house on Sunday and apparently this is meant to spur me into packing. Actually I have no intention of doing any packing. Instead I will firmly place myself in the integral role of Director of Operations. Surrogate teenage child (STC) and her boyfriend (STCBF) have decided to adopt the minimal approach to packing and either throw all STC's worldly belongings away, sell them or put them on the landing in the perfect spot for causing a fall down the stairs. As Director of Operations I attempted to explain that the main reasons for moving included more space, negating the necessity to minimalise! Other reasons include the fact I've got black hair dye on everything and moving house is the only way anyone is going to get me to sort out all my vintage stock. I delay this terrifying task mainly because everything is in the cupboard under the stairs, a dark dark place. An unforgiving treasure trove of madness! The surge of space at the new house is meant to rejuvenate and give me an open workroom and office fo all my future projects. The Vinatge Tea Party is back with an almighty autumnal bang but also working on some exciting plans I had long forgotten but now feel inspired to continue. Uncovering an unlikely inspiration yesterday gave me plan for the perfect Christmas gift for my quaint english living friends, gone are the shackles of the evil, overpriced and often easily replicated Kidston! We are reclaiming old and dusty as our own. Enough of all that for now....

So in charge of the physical act of packing is BF, a stalwart in my life and the person who keeps me grounded. Of course when faced with the task of packing his immediate reaction has been fear of what should happen to my glass collection in the removal process, so this has now been made removal priority. I am concerned that he is looking forward to seeing it leave current house and is in fact hoping it somehow gets lost in transit between Shirland Street and Albion Road. AWKWARD! Well if that should happen then I will merely have to take my rage out on Bass Guitar, Double Bass and The Kittens!

Another key element of moving house is a discussion on the purchasing of a new bed, something that is taking a great deal of research as I want vintage french and BF wants goodness knows what!

For now I will continue my trawl of ebay...
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